Once I first began this weblog, I used to be writing for straight girls.

Over time, as my weblog has acquired extra publicity, I’ve been requested about how masculinity and femininity works in same-sex relationships.

While I nonetheless write predominantly for straight girls, I need individuals to know that I don’t intend to exclude individuals in same-sex relationships in The Female Lady neighborhood, and neither do I search to perpetrate any intolerance in the direction of gays.

I perceive that folks have thought at first, that I used to be saying that same-sex relationships are flawed and shouldn’t exist. This isn’t the case in any respect!

So, as promised, and in response to some requests and ideas that I acknowledge same-sex relationships on my weblog, David and I’ve written this text.

We’re not specialists on this subject. Neither of us are homosexual, and neither of us can relate to being homosexual, or have a strong understanding of what it’s prefer to be in a same-sex relationship.

So the article is meant to be an open dialogue the place individuals can share their concepts and ideas on the subject – in order that we are able to all study from each other.

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what brings a relationship collectively within the first place?

Initially, for a relationship to type, there must be similarities. There’s bought to be issues in widespread in order that rapport will be established between the 2 individuals.

This might be…the identical work place, similar sense of humour, similar passions, opinions on necessary points, similar method of reacting to bizarre conditions, the identical humorous look and so forth,…something that’s related.

The rationale why we as people like commonalities is as a result of it makes us really feel safer to know that another person is like us.

Haven’t all of us at a while, by way of the ebb and movement of life, seen or met somebody who made us assume….

“Oh my god, he/she does that identical to ME!”

Commonalities construct rapport.

Rapport is the premise of communication and affect. You may’t get a message by way of to somebody if you happen to don’t have rapport with them. Subsequently you possibly can’t keep it up a relationship with them if there’s no rapport.

A variety of relationships are based mostly closely on commonalities. Actually, generally once we get right into a relationship, by way of our must be cherished…we are likely to subconsciously “copy” the opposite particular person and change into extra like them…in order that they may like us extra, and to really feel nearer to them! We’ve all been there to some extent.

(Learn my article about How To Develop Character)

Some {couples} even begin to appear to be one another after some time, and so they have the identical expressions, similar gestures, and even related facial options.

Commonalities give us certainty; one in all most necessary human wants. We have to really feel sure and protected to let go and be ourselves. 

Friendships are often based mostly round issues that two individuals have in widespread. Whether or not that’s objectives, actions, passions, likes/dislikes, and so forth.

(Learn my article: Warning About Girlfriends Who Don’t Praise You)

Commonalities Are Not Sufficient In Intimate Relationships…

In an intimate relationship nevertheless, except you propose simply to be associates eternally, commonality isn’t sufficient.

You want issues to be reverse to create polarity and keenness.

As a result of if you happen to had all the pieces in widespread together with your companion (no matter he’s doing, you’re doing too…no matter you’re doing, she’s doing too), then wouldn’t that get very boring in a short time?

To create ardour and pleasure, there’s bought to be variations. Attraction is brought on by polarity and opposites. Like a optimistic particle and a adverse particle creating cost in between them. There must be polarity to make a relationship thrilling and filled with selection.

In similar intercourse relationships, you’ll nonetheless have the ability to see the masculine and female polarity throughout the relationship.

We don’t wish to stereotype individuals, or trigger any extra segregation or marginalization than there may be already in society, so our intention isn’t to level the finger or exclude anybody.

Whether or not you’re in a heterosexual relationship or a same-sex relationship, it’s actually your alternative and we are able to’t inform you what’s proper or what’s flawed. We simply wish to clear up that sexual orientation is impartial of masculine or female.

Which means that if you happen to’re a person and also you’re female, you’re not essentially homosexual and vice-versa; if you happen to’re a homosexual man, it doesn’t imply you’re essentially very female. 

(Click on right here to take the quiz on “How Naturally Female Am I Truly?”)

The identical goes with girls; you don’t should be all masculine and macho to be a lesbian. Actually, now we have seen first-hand a number of extraordinarily female lesbians (who don’t know one another).

It’s in our perception that in any intimate relationship, there are masculine and female roles.

Which means that in similar intercourse relationships, there will probably be somebody who’s extra of their masculine and somebody who’s extra of their female at any time limit.

These roles can clearly be reversed (provides it sense of selection that method as effectively).

This isn’t to say that if you happen to’re each masculine or each female at your core {that a} relationship isn’t going to work. Since you will be completely masculine at work however nonetheless come residence and be radiant and female.

There are numerous roles in life, and as we tackle completely different roles, we modify our id, what we imagine, and our values.

We might love to listen to what it’s a must to say about this. The extra enter from everybody, the extra understanding we’ll all have. This isn’t a spot for judgment or separation, it’s a place the place we are able to come collectively and lengthen our understanding of ourselves, different individuals, and the world round us.

In the end, we would like individuals to stroll away with a deeper, richer appreciation and understanding of people.

Should you haven’t already, click on right here and obtain the “Goddess Report”

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So please remark under and provides your opinion as as to if there must be a masculine/female essence or function in same-sex relationships, simply as in heterosexual relationships.